Can anybody find me....Somebody to love

#4 Today I Learned.....
That I miss being loved by a significant other.....

RANDOM: Love these Shoes! so vintage!

Have you ever had those times when you wished you had someone to love? Someone who loves you and cares for you as you do to him/her. Have you ever longed for someone to embrace you from behind and just rest their chin on your shoulder? It's the worse feeling in the world : unrequited love, rejection, loneliness yet it's the most common feelings any of us have. We are all afraid to be alone and face what this world has to offer in solitude. I miss having someone to care for and support, I miss having a deep sexy male voice at the other end of my phone, and I miss falling asleep talking to my man. I have the I-miss-my-Joshua-why-won't-he-talk-to-me blues :'(
Do you think he's thinking and missing me as much as I do to him? (My brother says he doesn't and that he's probably sitting on his ass watching the Royal Wedding with tea and crumpets...stereotypical I know).
Oh Joshua you are my weakness and my flaw.......


My advice to you my lonely. unrequited, rejected, confused,semi-single, or single blog readers is to stay strong, have self respect and be true to yourself don't be no fool when love really don't love you


Alive and Well in Canada (Barely surviving immense heartache)


Susanne Dey

dimple piercings diary #2- infected.... again.....

After my smoke yesterday I felt sore and weird -like something wasn't right I knew that i'm probably infected so I took care of them as soon as possible (Its funny how two puffs can really mess them up!). I went into the ladies room and soaked them up with sea salt, chamomile tea, sprayed them with Bactine, and covered them with Polysporine. After I did all that I felt a bit better. I followed the same routine as always but slathered the Polysporine ointment on 3 times:morning, afternoon and night. I'm currently on my second day of the ointment, tomorrow's my last day and they have been doing alright. My only problem with them is that I am noticing that around my piercings looks discoloured (red and flaky) I think they are irritated from the sea salt soaks: I put a lot of salt and semi hot water.. BIG MISTAKE. Honey if you got these little suckers or thinking of getting them make sure to put a teaspoon of salt and lukewarm water then you won't have these....

If you look closely you can see that it's a bit red and irritated  

When all is said and done.

#3- Today I Learned.....
That hard work truly pays off when all is said and done...

Remedy to My Infected Dimple Piercings

Today was a really productive day, I had a creative crafts class and got my MIDTERMS!!!! I'm soo happy with my marks I got an 85% average and Carlton Uni emailed me the same day. Now I don't know for certain but I think i 'm ACCEPTED! I'm ecstatic- people thought I was high because I was dancing with joy! I got home and worked on my Avon group on facebook and I decided to have a contest. It's great i'm going to put the names of the people that bought $20 or more this campaign in a hat and have a live draw on may 22 @ 6:00. One downside to my day is that I sort of had a smoke when I was not supposed to, I never smoke but it was going around and I thought it would be fun (stupid I know, but the world is a stupid place). I immediately gargled with salt water but it still got infected so i'm treating that now.


My advice to you... is to work your ass off and always do your best, if you take it one day at a time and try your absolute best then you will reap great awards for your effort oh and your body is your temple....


Dream big,


Susanne Dey

Gee Mom maybe your arranged marriage will work... Maybe i will marry my ex -_-

#2 Today I learned....
That old ghosts will come back to haunt you....

Picture of the day skipped class and went to the lake.

I haven't seen my ex Jamal for 3 years now we haven't talked for the same. When we met we wanted to tie the knot but my mum said that he was the last person on earth she's even think of allowing me to marry. Jamal and I eventually broke up. My love life is very confusing, I've always been one of the aching kind. Now I overheard my mom saying that she wishes for Jamal and I to marry and its better for me to move to the middle east to raise my children as to not "make the mistake she made". What she does not understand is that I want to marry my dear sweet Joshua who I have been in love with for 5 years now (jamal was met in our breakup period) I don't like marriage but for those two I was wanting it.. now I'm stuck between three options:
1. Keep sticking up for Joshua even if my parents refused him because of his race
2. Marry Jamal
3. Be a single, empowered women for the rest of my days
With Joshua,he has an amazing British accent (he lives in britain) we are so compatible and with him I know we will have a partnership marriage where he will respect me and not use double standard but sometimes I feel like he only wants me because I am just "there" ( I say "I think about you ALWAYS, he says "I think about you OFTEN")
With Jamal he is totally arab washed and will be a dominating man not to mention he's 26 while I'm 19 (7 years apart). He has the best bum in the world and the body of a greek god. His pouty lips and puppy dog brown eyes used to drive me crazy! oh my gosh his back his sexyy! His gorgeous smile (he's missing 2 teeth/molars ahahahaha) and goofy laugh would drive me insane with desire but we are from two different worlds... And he's not educated (he dropped out in grade 5) I hate his family and his country and the way he was brought up. Double standard is his middle name..
But sometimes I wish to be alone I like being in the company of myself I don't need to be in a relationship I've tried but its awkward right now in my head it's either I am with Joshua as my life partner or no one at all! My parents need to understand that I am a grown women who can make her own decisions-especially ones as big as this.. This situation will not affect me now because I'm in school and still not old enough to officially be "put on the market" for arranged marriage but it will catch up with me in a year or so.. Why can't I have a normal life!??!


I miss Joshua...


My advice to you.... Do what your heart feel is absolutely right don't let others influence your decisions such as race, religion etc. And do whatever you can to be happy. That's my daily advice to you blog readers goodnight and take care!


Your ball of confusion,


Susanne Dey
(I'm craving a big fat gooey extra cheese greasy pizza with peanut butter chocolate
Ice cream, crab sushi, root beer, mango bubble tea, and marshmallows)

Cheek Piercings!!!! blog entry number one

Happy one month birthday to my CHEEK PIERCINGS!!! I wish I would have thought to make a blog when I first got them done because BOY were they an adventure!! I got them done March 12 2011 I bused there with my brother and his fiancée, my mum and dad finally caved in after 3 years of nagging. I went into Universal Tattoos in Downtown Ottawa (they are great!) and got them done. on a scale of 1-10 the pain was a 3 (mild discomfort) one side (the side with the dimple) bled and the other was a piece of cake! I swelled up instantly and looked like a chipmunk.....

ewwww.... I know hehehehe I have more pictures of my honeymoon period before all the piercing drama

So as you can see they stuck out, my mum hated that! I remember she used to say things like "serves you right for shoving two bones in  your cheeks" and it used to drive me crazy! after about 3 weeks I came home to home made apple pie and I was starving! so I took a bite and CRUNCH I bit on the bioplast flat back and it broke I had to beg my parents to drive me downtown and they finally did when I got there this new piercer decided to put a really short post on and of course my cheek swelled up and was in the process of swallowing up my jewelry that night I had the worst fever and my piercing was hot too touch. My face was soo sore(8 compared to the 3 for piercing :S) and my ears were red hahahahaha so that morning I went and got them exchanged to longer ones. They got infected and I had to treat them 

infected piercing notice discoloration its shiny from the polysporin

they were going great until I bit them again eating a snickers bar my dad was mad that he had to drive me I got them replaced and the piercer (my original that pierced me) put in shorter ones so I don't bite them I swelled up and skipped class the next day to get them replaced this time I got them shortened but not to short. So far the only problem I have with my piercings is the long post, hopefully after 3 months i'll get them shortened x) now here is the most important part... the advice and info


OK first of all make sure you 100% want these little suckers like long term (not just a year or so) because they may leave heavy duty scars (we're talking discoloration, holes,keloid scars and "the mysterious bump"). These piecing are not for you if you have bad skin that scars quickly, if you have sensitive skin, if your god made dimples are behind the first molar(the further back you go the more chances you have to hitting blood vessels, salivary glands and all that good stuff) and if you have/ plan to work a professional job.


Make sure you have a professional piercer feel free to ask to speak to them directly ask about the hygiene, the experience, and whether they use a flash light (to see where the vessels and stuff are)


MAKE SURE YOU BABY THESE PIERCINGS AND TAKE GOOOOOOOD CARE OF THEM!!!!!! the more care you put into them the more pleasant healing you will obtain (healing 3-6 months to 2-3 years)
use:
-non alcoholic Listerine for the first two weeks after everything you eat excluding bottled water (after don't use as more than twice a day as it may cause a yeast infection)
-Bactine
-Sea salt (if you have a slight infection where the lymph is yellow to green do a warm sea salt in shot glass for 5 minutes on 5 off etc.)
-polysporin ointment for 3 days if infected
-CHAMOMILE TEA!! oh my gosh this is a miracle for piercings the redness goes away and it soothes 


a bit of advice:
refrain from drinking milk the first 3 weeks (yeast infection)
CHEW SLOWLY AND NICE SMALL BITES!
put lots of pillows sleeping (head above your heart) to minimize nightly swelling
advil heavy duty pills for swelling
don't put makeup on it- like NOWHERE near it (I've been proudly sporting discoloured circles on my face for a month now)
careful while dressing and undressing (don't pull it)
don't use straws or make fishy faces first 3 weeks
don't play around with the jewelry 
no sexual oral contact of any kind!!!
change your pillow case or wash it every week there's sooo much bacteria living on that! it's good for your skin as well- you won't break out!
don't bite your jewelry -__-


these piercings are great, they just need a passionate person and a heavy duty cleaning routine I use the above medication bactine (two sprays every hour)
I'll post more details ;)

Smiles, love and laughter
Susanne Dey

Goodbye Fear and Nervousness, Hello Success!!

#1. TODAY I LEARNED....That through perseverance, great things are achieved and fears are overcome.


Don't you just hate all the work that has to be put into Senior Year?? Oh my gosh it's insane all the hours we put hunched over the computer screen trying to get an essay done- I suspect it can only get worse next year! I literally spent 6+ hours continuously hunched over my laptop screen yesterday. By the time I was done my back felt as if it was run over by a train! Don't get me wrong I love a challenge as much as the next chick but putting together that presentation was grueling work! Do not mistake this for complaining I'm just simply stating the obstacles I had to face in order to present my ISU/SUMMATIVE (canadian school curriculum in case you are wondering). My presentation was about Death and Grieving which is a very touchy subject for me (as I'm sure it is for most of you), my uncle (25) got into a car accident a year and a half ago and my family is still grieving for our loss. So as you can imagine I was trying to keep things light (but not insensitive...at least I hope) I was relying more on my videos than my information so I got up there ( I have a major fear of public speaking) and I started discussing death. The videos I chose was a clip from Girl Interrupted, Up, and Blue Oyster Cult's "Don't Fear the Reaper" (which are all great and highly recommended by the way) I also had one of those screamer videos at the end of my presentation. It was great!! I put some pictures of flowers, sunsets etc. and talked about what people go through when grieving near the end I said "but eventually"(cue the blood curling scream) death grabs you... And I swear the room burst into a screaming fit!! I died of laughter at their reaction!! Mostly because they had frightened me with their scream to the extent that my knees were knocking and I had to put my leg on the chair to conceal them (sad I know the pranker gets karma hehehehe). All in all it was a great presentation despite my complications ( the printer was not working and the projector was acting up for a good 30 minutes) ,though I could of been better. Hopefully that will keep me at my 90 average for midterms. I remember at one point of my presentation I bit on my cheek piercing it killed!! When I got home I started on my Avon sale on the computer, got that halfway done for tomorrow and rounded up the cash. I even made a facebook group dedicated to my business and up loaded a bunch of long awaited pictures x) Hooray for perseverance, hooray for screamers and hooray for success!!! I'm going to treat myself to a Tim Horton's berry smoothie with yogurt or mango bubble tea with extra tapioca pearls (again both HIGHLY recommended YUM!) I got to go with my mum to the hospital tomorrow she's pregnant and the doctors told her she has an increased chance of a down syndrome baby. She is going to get the needle just to make sure I'm going with her because my mum doesn't speak so much english and since I'm born in Canada I have to translate english into arabic for her. We are all very nervous :( I'll tell you how that goes tomorrow...
Through the obstacles,grief, and heartache it is important to continue on with perseverance because what does not kill you only makes you stronger...that is my daily advice for you ;)

My Death and Grieving binder  LOOOL ;)

Cordially Yours,
Susanne Dey <3

Welcome to My Path of Self Discovery

We've all seen it before (on movies, or in novels): a teenager facing conflict, role confusion, rebellion, eventually overcoming the conflict and reaching enlightenment....self discovery. My code name is Susanne Dey I wish to blog semi- anonymous, those of you who know me try not to blow my cover mmmm? Those of you who don't know me well it's a pleasure to finally meet you (hehehehe). This blog will consist of daily entries of whatever is in my head, on my heart, or in my fist. I will not fully explain who I am or what I am born to just yet (not in this post at least) that explanation will come out on it's own little by little. I am looking forward to blogging my daily activities, even if it's just for my eyes, but for those of you reading: welcome to my path to self enlightenment!!